Regular Juice readers may remember the Swedish transvestite who wanted to change his name to "Pia" but was not allowed to. Well, seems Mr. and Mrs. Tomaro want to name their daughter "Metallica." Her mom says that the name "suits her" because "she's decisive and knows what she wants."

On January 30, 1974, a young woman, who shall remain nameless, was arrested for prostitution. Having solicited a police officer (doh!), she sought a sentence of probation. Magistrate Judge Richard J. Rome complied. Unfortunately, he also issued the following Memorandum Decision: